I like to surprise my husband (Michael) on special occasions. Those can range from a birthday, Christmas, anniversary or just some random day. To tell the truth, I just LOVE to surprise those that I love. Its fun.
Since Michael does all of our finances and I am one of the lucky ones who never even has to slice open the envelope of a bill, I try to further the surprise by saving for these purchases via “skimming from the grocery bill” and then use whatever I was able to save to purchase a gift. (I know, my secret is out). The goal to be so he doesn’t know how much I pay for stuff in addition to the surprise factor. One particular year I had some BIG plans.
Michael has just about everything that a guy could want. I have purchased every power tool and re-build your car engine tool one could want. The longer we are together, the more difficult it is for me to come up with a really good gift idea – something better than a gift certificate to Barnes and Noble, although he appreciates that just as well. This particular year I had a good bit of cash saved up and decided to get Michael his own Kayak. Michael and his buddy Blake (aka –“Godfather”) have been kayaking together for years. Blake owns 3 of his own and Michael ends up borrowing or renting one for every trip. They took kayaking the rapids classes together and had talked about the two of them going down to the river after work on Fridays to kayak rather than hit Penny Lanes for beers over the summer and heck, its something he can do on his own too.
Part 1 – I called Blake for guidance on a GOOD kayak. I cant afford the kind of kayak Blake can, but with my budget we went online together and we picked one out. Blake wanted me to get a sit-in kayak, but I insisted on a sit-on-top as I fear that whole drowning thing AND those don’t require they be fitted to the owner. I ordered it and had it delivered to my neighbors’ house for safe storage in their garage until the big reveal day.
Part 2 – I arranged with Blake to invite Michael on a day trip kayaking on the Saturday of our anniversary weekend. Michael was excited to go and after some touch and go with the weather (and water temperature in early May), it was set.
Part 3 – The Friday before, I rushed home a bit early, got the girls to make a big Happy Anniversary poster and when Michael got home from work, they were sitting in the kayak in the front yard holding the poster. Might I say…………..it was the best surprise EVER!
Early the next morning, Blake came to get Michael, they loaded up the kayak and off they went for the day. About 4pm, Michael calls from the road to tell me to get dressed and he is taking me to dinner. When he and Blake got back, it didn’t take long to notice how badly Michael’s legs were sun burned. Evidently in all the excitement he completely forgot to use sunscreen on his legs (having been used to a sit-in kayak) and it was too late before he remembered. So, he was moving a bit slow, but we headed out to dinner.
We had a bit of wine before we left for dinner and shared a bottle while we were there. Toward the end of the meal, Michael announces we need to leave quickly as his legs are absolutely killing him. On the way home, we stopped at Rite Aid to get him some Benedryl. I am not certain where he got this notion, but he believes that Benedryl will take the pain away from his legs.
We headed home, he took a Benedryl and we opened another bottle of wine. We ended up watching the end of The Blues Brothers (can you believe he had NEVER seen it before??), finished the 2nd bottle of wine and went to bed.
The fun starts when about 5am I hear Michael get up to use the restroom. I hear the toilet flush then a strange guttural noise, a stumble, something thunk and a glass shatter. What concerned me was what I DIDN’T hear. I didn’t hear any cursing. In fact, I waited about 15 seconds and I didn’t year anything……so I investigated.
When I get to the bathroom door, I can’t really get in because Michael is sprawled long-ways across the double sinks while still standing and his back-side is blocking the door. I called his name, but he didn’t move. Is he breathing I wonder? I reach in and barely touch his back, “Michael?” I said. He jerks up, stumbles by me in the doorway and says “Wow, that was weird”. I tried to get him to stop and wait, but the momentum was in play. He stumbled forward, I tried to keep him from falling but couldn’t. He slipped out of my hand and fell, like a 100 year old oak tree, to the ground. He didn’t even make a move to break his fall. The floor shook. Heck, the whole 2nd floor shook. HE BOUNCED….like the Bumble in Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. I am surprised Hunter didn’t wake up in the next room.
When I got to him, he didn’t move. Was he breathing? It was hard to tell, but when I touched him, he snapped out of it again and tried to get up. I made him stop and wait for me to ensure he wasn’t hurt. He had cut his chin, but other than that, no injury. I helped him get back into bed and he went back to sleep. Of course, I couldn’t sleep anymore. I had some coffee and continued to check on him to make sure he was breathing and not stumbling around getting hurt.
About 2 hours later, he was waking up and groggy. He said “I’m not sure we’re going to make it to church today” at which point I laughed and said “You aren’t going anywhere today mister. What the heck happened to you?” He had no memory of what had happened (stunned!) so I filled him in on all the gory details at which time he said……
FAMOUS LAST WORDS “Maybe I shouldn’t have taken that Valium with the Benedryl and the wine”.
Do NOT drink wine and take other stuff
Do NOT mix Benedryl or anything
Do NOT drink wine, take Benedryl AND a Valium.
DO……..make sure the insurance is paid, cuz momma is getting a swimming pool.
I say the swimming pool thing as a joke. Michael knows I would wait at least a season to put in the swimming pool…..its cheaper off-season to have it installed anyway.